every day I "start over" so it seems. What a waste. When I read the support message boards about people in my same situation, stuck in the same cycle, the first thing that comes to mind is empathy, and the second is practicality: YOU and ONLY YOU can stop it so why are you continuing this thing you know is ruining your life?
So why do I ignore that same concept when it comes to myself? I just let it control me. I'm not a crackhead but I act just as badly.
I slept in way late yesterday and stayed up all last night to study for my exam. I also made an amazing batch of chocolate chip muffins and b/p on them of course. I don't know why. Today in class the teacher lectured "us" majorly about people who are not attending class. I put "us" in quotes because I'm sure he was talking about me specifically, considering there are only seven students in the class and they all seem to be eager-beaver goody-goodies. So it's the end of the second week and I only came three times... oops. Anyway, I felt appropriately ashamed and will come every day for the next two weeks. I do have an appt with the cardiologist on Tuesday so I will have to miss part of that time.
I read that there is a rumor going around that Paris Hilton is bulimic. I'm guessing Paris Hilton is the most discussed topic in the blogosphere, so this will be her one and only chance to get mentioned in my blog. Paris, if you're reading this, 1) get help and 2) send me money.
1 comment:
Hey, just wanted to tell you that I feel your pain here. I've been bulimic for 10 years now at 24 and I have a feeling I will be identifying with a lot of your posts. Forgive me if I zealously comment; it never ceases to amaze me that someone else could be living through the exact feelings that I have. Mostly exact, I imagine. This goes for the not- having-a-degree-yet thing too. Anyway, thanks for making this blog. :)
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