I had a nice Christmas..... except I ate so much. I ate like a pig. I wanted to take the rest of the cake I made home and eat it too but didn't... I drank a lot too but didn't even get buzzed... (hmmm.... probably because I ate so much!).
I did nice makeup but my goodness I am so fat. I took a pic with my crush and it's just terrible, not a keeper at all. I need to start exercising asap.
On the Fishy MB there is a thread about how whether or not purging actually works in terms of preventing calories from being absorbed... they are saying it doesn't, and that the longer you have been bulimic the quicker you digest food you eat. That makes sense because this sure used to work, it doesn't anymore.
I need some Daily Affirmations... Every day I will write a reason why I deserve to get better.
I deserve to get better because...
I'm good enough
I'm smart enough
and doggone it, people like me!
1 comment:
Lies, all of them. It's all a matter of how long you wait to throw up, and how efficient you are at getting it all up. If I didn't intentionally eat and keep down food every day in addition to b/p mounds of food every day, I would weigh closer to 80-90lbs instead of 105. I don't want to get that low though cause I'm broke and can't afford to buy smaller clothes. Even if I did, I always wear the same two or so outfits anyway so when they get too loose, I'm screwed. Anyway, all you have to do is look in the toilet to see the calories you spared yourself. I "rinse until all I can taste coming from my stomach is either stomach acid or the taste of the tap water (I drink 8 or 10 gulps from the sink, give a split second for the water to mix with my stomach contents and throw it up. I do this until what comes up is totally clear.)
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